pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
Randomize
