i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
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