yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
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