IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Randomize
