She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
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