did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
