are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Pooping to opera.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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