i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
