I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Randomize
