She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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