No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
