M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
