thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
