I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
