did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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