we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
