OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize