If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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