Where is the hickey?
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Randomize
