i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
