We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
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