Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
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