I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
Randomize
