If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize
