hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
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