i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
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