ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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