Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
I'm too high and old for this...
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
Randomize
