and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
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