i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Randomize
