is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
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