called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
