i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
