It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
