make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
You dont lie about slip and slides
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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