Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Randomize
