Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Randomize
