Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
