i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Say something about gay babies.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
