WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Randomize
