i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Randomize
