Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
