I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
NoShamevember. You game?
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Randomize
