pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
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