feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
