May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
