Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
