I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Randomize
