he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
