Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
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