Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Randomize
