so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
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