i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
